Mid life Crisis??

I have thinking about changes I could be making in my life lately. You know, I really think you get to an age and you start contemplating how can my life be better. Am I living it the way that I want it to be?

Some people may react in a certain way and call it a “mid life crisis”. I am going to to call it a mid life evaluation.

I am not really in crisis mode but I am in a serious contemplation about who I am and where I want to be.

I had the opportunity to go to a different church today. It was wonderful. I felt the spirit. The tone was welcoming. The feel was uplifting. The music was enjoyable. There was so much going for this place. The thought crossed my mind “I could go to church here”.

I quickly had a few realization related to MY feelings and MY testimony. Being a member of  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints isn’t always easy. There are sacrifices to be made and it can be difficult to live in the world but not be “part” of the world. It is a church that can require much of its patrons. However, it also provides so much for me as well. It also gives me incredible strength, comfort and peace in  world that can be confusing. It has allowed me to look out side of myself and think about the lives of others.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has not only gifted me with an incredible life on this Earth, I have been given a promise of a eternal principles and ordinances.

I was reminded today that the knowledge of being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is a wonderful blessing. It isn’t an easy path I have chosen. I can be ostracized, made fun of, dismissed, mocked etc…but the love, compassion and understanding I have gained has completely changed my life. I am a completely different person thanks to the gospel of Jesus Christ.

There is no reason for me to have a mid life crisis. I have built my foundation upon the sure foundation of our Lord and Savior. So, when my life feels in crisis, I turn to my Heavenly Father for added strength and guidance.

How grateful I am to be reminded of this in such a sweet and powerful way! I was also very blessed to hear some amazing things going on in our community.

Have a great week!

healthy living mama

Okay, lets be real this is how the change in eating has gone.

I lost 10 lbs! Gained 4lbs! Lost 5lbs! Gained 2lbs! Lost 3lbs! All in a month. I am obviously capable of losing weight as I continually prove. 🙂

I love this program. it is a perfect fit for me. I can tell it works but I am still learning balance. It is so hard.

My starting weight is a whopping 224lbs. I am solidly at 214lbs. I can’t believe I am doing this but…. this is where I am starting from. https://share.coach.teambeachbody.com/?lang=en-US&postId=865621&coachId=1656036

Click on the link above for more information.

I am a work in progress. I am going to be my best self. I am becoming more mindful. I am making choices instead of allowing food to choose for me.

There is still time to join me. Every day is a chance to improve yourself. Whatever that journey entails for you.

I am actually on a bigger journey than my weight. I am on a journey of self discovery, of financial peace and health.

What journey are you on? Or which one would you like to be on? I will go with you through it.

Start today! It is never too late.

an emotional week

I have had an amazing and devastating week.

To start, my sweet friend Anne and her 2 granddaughters, were in a car accident. an impaired driver ran a red light. Anne passed away on Sunday (the day of the accident) and 8 year old Emily succumbed to her injuries Thursday morning of the same week.

Tuesday, was my last day teaching my kinders.

Wednesday was the graduation of 3 of my sons, Jonathan, Andrew and Nathan.

Thursday,we found out Emily had gone to live with her Heavenly Father.

Thursday was also my last day at school.

My emotions were all over the map. I was elated, crying, shocked, happy, sad, in disbelief, amazed, proud, overwhelmed and grief stricken. I was joking that my brain did not know how to process all of the emotions I was feeling. I would use randomly start crying. It was a rough week emotionally.

Now, I have had a little time to process a bit. It has been almost a week ago that everything happened.  I still have all of those emotions but they have evolved.

I am still in shock and disbelief. We will be traveling to the funeral this week. I am flooded with memories. Some of my boys as young kiddos. Some of Emily from the time she was born until now. The times I talked to Anne and received her comfort, support and understanding.

I have even had some unbelievably selfish thoughts. One of which is…”How will I feel about finding joy at Disneyland again?” “Will I be able to laugh and not feel bad that my sweet girl is not there?” I am sure I will have a few thoughts like this but overtime, the sadness will be replaced with joy for having these precious people in my life for the time I did.

Dr Suess has a wonderful quote,”Don’t cry because it is over. Smile because it happened.”

My next thoughts have led me to better myself. When my time  or when one of my children’s or spouse comes. Where do I want to be? Spiritually, Mentally, Physically? I have made some significant changes in my life lately. It has been a wonderfully eye opening experience. I have felt so strengthened and uplifted by what has transpired the  past week.  I have decided that I have been lazy in my approach to what I have been taught and shown. I am determined to continue the journey which I am on.

My 3 boys…

One son already moved out and the other 2 will follow later this summer. While I will joke about finally having some space empty in my home, I will miss each of those boys. I am grateful to be their mom. While we have had some struggles I realize, there is nothing more important than my family.

Now, as I am writing I am beginning to cry again. I realized I haven’t really addressed all of my feelings about losing these 2 remarkable people. But, I guess that is how grief works. I will be okay and then a thought occurs and I will be sad for a time. Then I will be surprised that I am smiling.Only to then feel somewhat guilty for doing so. Yuck!

Out of the many lessons I have learned this week, this is the most amazing one. I have been reminded of the Lord’s plan for us. I have been reminded the Plan of salvation is true. I have been reminded of the truthfulness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I know the Book of Mormon is true. I know I am lead by a living prophet on this Earth. (You should have seen the broadcast on Sunday!) I know that families are eternal when blessed through the proper priesthood authority. I know the Temple is the House of the Lord.  How do I know? Because I asked. then, I asked again and again. When I doubted, I asked again. I know that I belong to the true and living Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I look forward to the day I will see miss E and Anne again as well as all of my family and friends that have gone before me.

“God Be With Us till we Meet Again.”

picture: Kelli, Josh and Emily with our family

Kids smartwatches

I have looked these smartwatches for kids and I have been so intrigued.

GPS kids smartwatch

I have thought maybe they are a waste of money but, I  also love the accessibility to my kids and knowing where they are.

Do you find your kids call you a lot?

Do they work like you think they would?

Hmmm…..let me know.

Results of one week mindset change

Well friends, I have lost 7.5 lbs this week! I am so proud of myself.

I really have still eaten most of what I want. I have maintained a positive outlook on food and I have wondered why I am “craving” certain foods.

I have realized I have a really hard time when food is free. I really want food because it is free and I may not have the chance to get that particular thing again.

It has been a really eye opening experience for me to reflect on what I think food does for me. I only have a few spots left for my challenge group if you want to start, let me know.

NO FOOD GROUPS ARE ELIMINATED! I had a yummy hot fudge sundae last night. While I don’t eat like that EVERY day. I felt that treat was really awesome!!

https://share.coach.teambeachbody.com/?lang=en-US&postId=865621&coachId=1656036

It happened to be called Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day…………

Why does that evoke so many emotions in all of us?

For Mother’s…. it can be day of feeling less than adequate. As you look longingly at all of the posts of everyone thanking their beloved mother’s and you wonder why your kids don’t feel the same way.

For those that are not yet mother’s…it is a day where you are made aware of your lack of children. When that is what you want the most and yet you still don’t have it.

For those that have lost children….it is a reminder of how your child is not in your arms. It is a reminder of what you are missing out on because your child is not here with you.

As an adopted mom, this day has always evoked negative emotions. It is a day where some of my children are reminded I am not their birth mom. It has always been a day that is one to endure.

This year, as I have been working on affirmations and becoming self-aware, I realized it is just a day with a label. How will my life really be impacted by this one day? It really won’t. Because, the next day will come. I will not be any different than I am today.

As a result, of my inner strength and resilience, I was able to treat yesterday as just another day. You know what? It was a wonderful weekend. I was calm. I was uplifted. I was aware. I was understanding AND I was so grateful. So many of my kiddos remembered me. I was able to be genuine. I was also able to be appreciative.

Am I glad I am a Mother? Yes!

But more importantly, I am grateful to be a righteous woman. I am glad I living by my high moral standards. I am glad to be relying on my Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ. I am amazed at the influence a righteous woman has on those around us.

Sisters, we are more than a day! We have eternal value and influence.

Thank you to all of the valiant, strong women who influence my children and myself. Your “worth is far above rubies” (Proverbs 31:10). Thank you noble and virtuous women.

I am blessed to associate with you.

Happy Mother’s Day dear women.